Welcome
to a whole new year
of shenanigans

Dear readers, there are just some things you should never trust me with: the last slice of pizza, your mum, and New Year’s resolutions. In fact, you should not trust me with most things under the sun, but those, in particular, you should be wary of. Granted, none of the above three affect you literally – unless your mum is Jennifer Lawrence then GO TO YOUR ROOM I GOT THIS, but given my penchant to promise you withhold certain information that quite positively can lead to your actual general wellbeing (let’s be honest, how many things off the internet can you apply this to?), you should check up with me at least once if not 364 more times in a given year. For instance, promises to share how I kicked my eczema’s ass, or sharing a bit of know-how in terms of graphic design, as according to this ruddy account. Nobody cares whether I post Part II of a press-trip from 2012 – that I know for a fact.

As always my excuse is: my dog ate my homework, and I got busy; check my Snapchat (Sparkncube) for proof. On the other hand, don’t check Snapchat. Between Simon and me dancing in the office like a pair of lunatics, I’ve just realised that the rest are of me making jell-o and jiggling it (if my life were a movie I’d like Nicholas Cage to play me). I get it, this freshly-turned teen/neglectful parent excuse is getting old, and I do apologise. Said she, barely looking up from her laptop. This year my only three resolutions are these: 1) Get fat 2) Start drinking like a Polish farmer, and 3) start sending family daily hate-mail. By mid-January I’ll do the usual annual thing of forgetting all about it and revert to doing the complete opposite, at least with adequate effort this time.

Hope you had a successful first ten days of the New Year, and while I intend to deliver (at least partially) on last year’s promises within the next few years weeks – if your questions are urgent always feel free to shine a poop emoji into the sky and I’ll fly to your aid, Febreeze in one hand, a plunger in another. In all seriousness, some of you have e-mailed about eczema and I am more than happy to help. Welcome, to another year of shenanigans and illustrated rants.

park-and-cube_New-Year-2016

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23 Comments

  1. HAHA. This is why I usually hesitate to say my New Year resolutions aloud. I prevent myself from public fail. No, I’m not trying to say you’ve failed. The opposite is true, you know. I’m looking forward to all your amazing posts Shini. Have a great year!

  2. I really love the photo!

  3. The picture is perfect!
    I am not a resolution kind of person.
    I make intentions and then just never voice them out to people.
    I write them down for me as i go on daily.

    http://www.distinguisheddiva.com/2016/01/happy-birthday.html#more

  4. Resolutions are depressing for me, Great post and the picture is wow!
    Love, Sia | http://www.winternsuggle.com

  5. Throwing a poop in the air in 5 minutes. *laughs*

    Real Life Nerd // http://www.vivienekok.com

  6. Happy new year!
    Yeah I shouldn’t be trusted with new year resolutions either, they just don’t go well with me
    xx
    http://anoddgirl.blogspot.com/

  7. La Bijoux Bella | by mia

    Happy & cheers to a new fabulous year. :)

    La Bijoux Bella | by mia

  8. Haha, this cracked me up!
    Happy new year Shini! I look forward to seeing what you have in store for us this year! May this be another creative and inspirational year for you!
    http://www.theavantguardian.com

  9. Haha, this cracked me up!
    Happy new year Shini! I look forward to seeing what you have in store for us this year! May this be another creative and inspirational year for you!
    http://www.theavantguardian.com

  10. At the very least your list is the most refreshing I’ve seen so far! Start Drinking Like a Polish Farmer. This should be the title of one of them arthouse films – I’d watch the shit out of it if it would also star Nic Cage :-)
    Have a funtastic year, Shini!
    XO,
    Izzy
    http://www.nearnoise.com

  11. I never made any resolutions this year, mostly because they’d involve getting more fit or taking a dance class or something, but we all know I’ve already failed there so meh. Happy 2016 Shini!

    ~F

  12. Lovely pic :)

  13. I stop thinking about New Year resolutions when I heard that Santa is not real. Since then I start having fun. Live each day as your last… resolution! Happy new year!

  14. Nice photograph!

  15. Well, I love your humour and your pics and I stalk basically all your social media but Please, PLEASE, don’t write such things as if all polish men were alcoholics. I mean, okay, there are some, but these are just foolish stereotypes I’m sick of. Just like they say German girls are ugly. C’mon. I know many pretty ones! Sorry but my grandma is a farmer and I’m from Poland and he’s a hard-working, conciencious man I look up to and I feel like I’m gonna throw up if I’ll hear again, after saying I’m polish, that propably I have vodka for breakfast :/

  16. Alice

    Love your writing as always! May this year be everything you wish for and more ;)

    xo, Alice | Alice + TYPENU

  17. Happy New year Park and Cube

    Continue to be amazing

    http://carissainez.com

  18. such a beautiful photo :)

  19. I’m not a type of person who follow my plans and resolutions too :))

    And i have to say that the pictures is absolutely beautiful <3

    Love from Best Bags 2016

  20. Ha we share the same sentiments when it comes to New Year’s resolutions. Happy new year Shini, and looking forward to your upcoming posts! (Please have multiple on drinking like a Polish farmer, I would thoroughly enjoy that) :)

    http://www.thestylesynapse.com

  21. Piture perfect ! Nice Post !
    http://www.angelmstyle.com

  22. Opposite new years resolutions are great, the feeling of relief when you don’t keep them is glorious. Looking forward to reading all your musings this up coming year.

    Cheers,
    Mia

    http://www.justanotherasiangirl.com

  23. Hi Karolina, I’m sorry if this offended you in any way. If it’s of any consolation I grew up in Warsaw and my husband is from a goodhearted (vodka-fuelled) Polish farmer family – it’s all things I love. BTW don’t you have vodka for breakfast? Because I sure do.